Inside Jokes

To me, it's one of the fun aspects of family life. Having those "inside jokes" that no one else knows the stories behind. Uttering a few nonsensical words that can elicit instant hilarity. Here are some of ours:

"Two watermelon slushies and that nasty one!"

"Hey kids, look! There's a bison!" (rock) "A snake!" (a rope)

"The woodpecker is back!"

"Are you ready Freddy? Ready Francine?"

"Hey, there's another Campbell's Soup Factory!"

"Goooooooo truck!"

"Here is your information on the situation.....oh, he's got frustration"

"I've been a BAAAAAAAAD boy"

"Chocolate......house!"

"Only bawls are circles"

"It's ALL ABOUT the tile guy!"

"You don't even know about my life!"

"Wedgie Tales..."

"Get out of the chicken!"

"Oops! I've got some bad news."

"Can I please try some wallows?"

"It's FOGMON to the rescue!"

"Welcome to Shamalama.......You're underarrested!"

Just One Of Those Things That Yelled Out To Be Blogged

"Come on, guys. It's time to get up. Time to get ready for school." I flipped on the light.

"Uggggghhhh. Mom! Please turn off the light. It's too SHINY in here!"

---Justice

Priorities, People!

The other day on my husband's news page, I saw two separate headlines about the results of some supremely important scientific studies. One was about the effect of gym grunting on a physical workout and another proved that indeed, dinosaur fish did, in fact, posses the awesome ability of see in color. Far (FAR) out, man! Whether or not these studies were government or privately funded (and I didn't have time to read the entire articles to find out, interesting though they may be), I'm going to throw out a wild and CRAAAAAZY theory of my own. Wouldn't the hundreds of thousands spent on these studies have been better used, say, feeding starving people or creating college scholarships for kids who demonstrate good character? I'm all for fun weird stuff. But, just maybe we should make sure needs are met FIRST. I know. Call me crazy. I really like to live on the edge......

Oh, What A Night!

Yesterday, my hubby was struggling to fight off a spirit of annoyance that was growing all day long. You know those kind of days where stuff just bugs you, and you can't even really pinpoint why? I was walking on egg shells trying to offer only a few neutral comments on anything!

The garage door broke on the way out the door for church. That made him late as he's trying to set a good example for his high school Sunday School class.

Then the staff at a restaurant we frequent wanted to be a bit too "attentive" for him, prolonging the check and getting home.

Not that it would have been a big deal otherwise, but an already bothersome morning was further tainted as his fantasy football quarterback was injured on the second play and caused him to lose large to his arch enemy and fall out of first place.

Then his nap was abruptly interrupted when one of the children decided to "play a trick" by ringing the doorbell. She, ahem, was not supposed to even be outside.

Time for evening church rolled around and I half way expected my husband to excuse himself from services. It's not that he makes a habit of it, but he looked exhausted. The pastor, however, had emphasized that morning that his message would be about a topic we are passionate about teaching our teenagers - the pitfalls of se*xu*al immorality.

So together we went. As we drove to church that night, the thunderstorms promised earlier in the day seemed to finally be slowly forming. The sky was overcast; the air felt like an ominous mix of fall crispness and the springlike smell of strong storms approaching.

The sermon was fine. The pastor's honesty about what is going on in schools today shocked a lot of the older members of our congregation. But sadly it was all familiar to us from the reports of our kids who beg weekly for prayer to stand firm in the midst of their Sodom and Gomorrah High Schools. It was nice to have some validation that what our kids are dealing with is much more than just foul language and bad attitudes.

Finally, we headed home to rest and relax before starting a new day. The skies had now turned black - an eery greenish blue-black from the heavy, condensed vertical storm clouds in the sky. Feeling he could finally try to wind down from his day, hubby was even chatting a little with me as we approached the highway. But we both stopped talking instinctively to let him concentrate as we noticed the car three ahead of us stop abruptly to turn into the neighborhood he had nearly missed. A chain reaction ensued. And although I knew we would be landing very, very close to the car ahead of us, I somehow sensed we wouldn't hit. No one can stop a big truck with more finesse than Greg. The very instant we came to a complete stop - BANG!!!

Where had it come from?

In my confusion, I accidentally managed to look in the direction of the white Ford Explorer turning perpendicular to the curb and heading for the telephone pole barely on two wheels and appearing to be in mid-flip. It's like my heart said a prayer without words as I tried to will the vehicle back on all fours, nevertheless knowing it was out of my control. His front two tires cleared the curb as his back two bounced off the road behind it, propelling him into the common grass area before the parking lot, and mercifully (thank you, God!) several feet away from the phone pole.

All of this was in a construction zone as storms were making their way quickly toward us. There was no safe place to pull over and it appeared a witness, unable to find a suitable place to stop, was deciding to leave the scene. We didn't want to appear to be doing the same. So hubby pulled several yards up to give the traffic ample time to see our lights (and the mass of plastic and metal hanging from our truck) and parked by the curb in far right lane.

Everyone was O.K. The kids were panicked and my two youngest near tears. We sat for a good minute trying to discern what had happened when the dry line hit. A few sprinkles and a good stiff wind. That snapped Greg out of shock and into "better hurry" mode.

Remarkably, miraculously, the other driver and his girlfriend also were not hurt. They had gone semi-airborne and the front of his car looked at least as bad as our side, but thank God, LITERALLY, they were O.K. They called the police as hubby had also forgotten his cell phone and mine was not working.

Since during the wreck, our attention had been diverted forward, the other driver had a much better idea of what had happened. As the cars had begun slamming their brakes one by one, the two cars behind us had made efforts to instead swerve over into the far right construction lane. The one immediately behind us was the one we had thought to be the "witness." But the Explorer behind him had anticipated his move even earlier and was already up beside "the witness," who clipped him and then ran. This propelled the Explorer into our second tire wheel well, which then sent him flying. "The witness" who had left the scene had caused the whole thing. (And looking at how the damage landed, we believe the Explorer driver's report.)

It seemed like forever for the police to arrive. In actuality, it was probably about 6-7 minutes. (They were aware it was a NON-injury hit and run.) By the time they arrived, the storm had turned into sideways blowing hail! We had waited to pull the hanging pieces off the truck to load them for driving home because we knew the officer had to see where everything landed for his report. The Explorer driver and my husband got soaked loading the pieces up and I got soaked as the officer stood at my door to take our report while leaning as far into the cab as he could for shelter. The four of us were not wet, but DRENCHED. Pieces of signage and loose debris were now being blown into the night sky as I attempted to write our information for him on wet paper in his notepad. I really think he just finally decided to commit our number to memory. Honestly, for all we were dealing with, both the officer and the driver of the Explorer, a student at our near-by college, could not have been any nicer or more professional. What a blessing to deal with this set of people on such a dreary night.

I wanted to post a picture of the significant damage, but true to the kind of day it was - full of bothersome LITTLE details - I can't find my camera cord. I am just THANKFUL! Thankful we are all O.K. Thankful for God answering prayers we can't speak and moving either cars or phone poles to accommodate survival. Thankful we were in my hubby's big honking truck. Just thankful it's over and the kids got a real life lesson in finding the positive.

This morning felt a little strange. Everyone awoke with this surreal sense that last night's events were forefront before even a word was uttered. This will forever now be one of life's most prominent shared memories for the five of us. And we are keenly aware of it. We are grateful for the way it ultimately turned out, but it almost doesn't even feel real, even though it's all we've talked about.

But we can add this to the blessings: Greg was forced to take today off due to the rain last night, and the kids were already out of school for conferences, so we were able to sleep in and share today as a family - even as we silently celebrate that we still are one.

The Next Week

The next week is overflowing with activity in our household - some good and some we are dreading just a little bit. But all of it requiring focused attention and one of them a big surprise that will be fun to come back and post. Until then, I would be truly appreciative if you'd send up a small prayer for Ashley or even leave some encouragement for her Momma and Daddy if you feel so inclined. She is so blessed - but also still struggling - and her family is tired. And to be completely honest, I am hurt for them and feeling helpless to do anything. Especially because I know they feel that so much worse than I do. At least I have the diversion of my own family's needs. THIS IS their need. Thank You!

Bear ye one another's burdens, and so fulfil the law of Christ. Galatians 6:2

Lord, I know none of us can ever possibly do this for everyone all the time. But please help me, in particular, to do it more and better than I have in the past. And please help me this coming week, to set priorities within Your will and to accomplish the necessary goals set before me. In Jesus precious name.

She Digs Him; He Digs....Something Else?

While this may be indicitive of our private family conversations, it is not something I normally allow our children to repeat publicly, just for the record. And yet here it is out in cyberspace, albeit for our own humor and memories. It's nothing BAD. I just didn't want to give the impression that we are ALL about potty humor and bodily functions.

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This evening just before leaving for dinner, my daughter came into the laundry room where my son and I were talking to present him with a small gift bag. She quickly ran out and giggles could be heard emanating from her bedroom where her friend was. My son opened the bag to find some candies and a note:

"Dalton is so handsum. I wont to marry Dalton."

Now while the idea of a girlfriend is still far from my son's mind right now, I DO think it rather stroked his ego just a little, judging by the awkward grin and the eye-roll.

A few minutes later in the car, he was complaining to his dad that having your sister's friend have a crush on you is just "gross." And I think his sister agreed - having your friend have a crush on your brother is no picnic in the park either.

Here was the hubby's advice: "Just wait until she is looking at you with those dreamy eyes and then reach in real good and pick out a booger."

Everyone: "Ewwwwww!"

"Well, I guarantee she won't like you anymore! Right, Babe?"

How did I get roped into endorsing this advice?! But he had a point. "Uh....YEAH!" (Duh!)

Who knew my husband had such a bag of tricks for repulsing women? But I love him.

Hey, what's that smell?

Happiness Is.....

seeing your skinniest, most charismatic, pulled-together friend running frantically into school with her always perfectly coiffed hair in a bushy pony tail, no makeup and mismatched flip flops! Then having her slow down long enough to point out her two different shoes just to make sure she could start MY day with a laugh! Tell me that's not sweet friendship!

We stood there in the school hallway for a good minute belly laughing as our daughters and their young friends looked on. Her attitude set such a great example for the girls. I admire my friend and seeing her laugh at these Monday moments helps to remind me that I'm not alone in the craziness of life. That her sweet spunk is real and attainable - Amen? G., I hope your Monday perks up to the level that you always do! Love ya! (And LOVE your shoes!)

Think, Cry, Smile, And Pray

Today as I navigated my way through Blogland, I found several posts that offered much more in the way of wisdom and beauty than anything I have to offer today. Do yourself a favor and stop by here and here as well!

Heat Wave

Here in our little corner of the world, the ground was frozen solid with ice in January and February. Then it rained for three months straight this spring and summer. Now they are forecasting two MORE weeks of 90 degree temperatures through October. It's been a crazy year for weather in our area! It's a guessing game every day for my poor hubby working outside on a daily basis. (And picking pumpkins in a heat wave just doesn't seem "right.") But at least when WE say there's nothing to talk about but the weather, it can be a rather exciting conversation. And I am getting to wear my cute sandals and sheer tops a little longer than usual. Plus I love driving with the windows down. How is the weather in your area?

DUH, Mother!

I was complaining to my son that Blogger needs a feature that lets you listen to music chosen to help your mood in writing about a specific topic. Sometimes the quiet makes me lack the sentiment I would like to pour into my words.

I was thinking about the inconvenience of blaring my melodies from the living room or hauling a boom box into the office where I write.

"Um, how about an IPOD. They're only, like, sixty dollars and you can download any song you want from right there at the computer. You can even plug it into the computer to use those speakers."

Yeah......well.......WHEN I WAS KID you had to put a cassette tape in a big bulky player with batteries that died after three songs, buddy, and it always snowed outside when you played it........and..........

When did I become my parents?

HAPPY BIRTHDAY FAITH!!!

My Dear, Sweet Little Lollipop,

Everybody always says they can't think of just one favorite thing they like most about someone they love so much. There are just too many good things to pick from. But I can.

It's your laugh. You have absolutely the purest, most genuine laugh that I've ever heard! It is at once robust and girly, sincere and infectious and I have NEVER ONCE been able to keep from smiling when I hear it! Not even on my darkest days.

You are a joy from top to bottom! A "favorite" just means that it is the best of many good attributes - and you are full of them!

I know it might not be your favorite thing, but I LOVE the way your freckles dot only one side of your face! It reminds me so much of your life. From one angle you look so grown up, and it reminds me of how gracefully you are maturing into a classy young lady. But on the freckled side, I still get to enjoy you as the carefree little girl deserving of all life's innocence for just a bit longer.

And I love those ADORABLE round little buns in a bathing suit! I'm sorry, but I do! You CRACK ME UP when you do "squeezy cheeks," when you lock those knees together and scrunch your buns up, walking in little baby steps like a Chinese woman while speaking hilarious stories in that IMPECCABLE British accent! Oh, my, word - how you can make me laugh! You are SO FUNNY!

And smart. I've been blown away by all you've learned this year Biblically. You have such great questions and you never settle for the simple explanation. You want to know WHY you should believe what you are told and I LOVE THAT! Your teachers are equally as blown away with the depth of spiritual understanding you can garner and even explain to others from your Bible lessons. God has given you tremendous insight in this area, and I am so proud of you for using it for humble purposes and honest living.

This year, you have also practiced courage in a way that has made me so proud of you! You had a rough year last year, but you have never used that as an excuse. I have heard that the definition of courage is not the lack of fear. But that it is fearing the unknown and facing it anyway. You have been the absolute embodiment of courage by that definition and I couldn't be prouder! God richly rewarded you for it this year, too.

I guess every Mom wants to be the one to give her daughter the present that her daughter likes better than all the rest for her birthday. But this year, you got one even greater than the one that Daddy and I have picked out for you. God gave you Jenny. I LOVE to watch the two of you riding your bikes down the street together, giggling about secrets that only the two of you know. I love watching your matching pigtails bob up and down as you pedal, shadowing the tassels hanging from your handle bars. Your fair hair and skin color and her dark hair and complexion, often in matching outfits. God has given you the joy of a best friend. Jenny was the answer to some of my most earnest prayers for you.

My prayers for you are many and they always will be. I want you to be happy and grounded and for the deep love that we have for you to always be apparent to you! I want the world to be kind to you. You are such a vital part of it. The world is such a sunny place in the spot where you stand. You are amazing to me in every way! So humble and forgiving and sharing and kind. So encouraging and funny and smart. Like I always say, you are SWEET ON A STICK - forever our LOLLIPOP!

HAPPY 8TH BIRTHDAY SWEET GIRL!

WE LOVE YOU WITH ALL OF OUR HEARTS!

Imaginations

"I think when I grow up and have my own job, I'm going to adopt."

"That's wonderful!" I beamed, glad that he has perceived the positive example running all through our family. So many of my relatives were adopted and we have blended into a group of people rightly fit for one another.

"Yeah, that way I can have kids without getting married."

I picked up a big tub of laundry soap as we perused the aisles of Walmart.

"I bet you'll change your mind about wanting to be married by then."

"Nope."

"Well, then, how are you going to take care of your baby while you are at work?"

"I thought if I can be a pro-sport referee of some kind, then I would make pretty decent money AND I could bring him with me so he could watch from the sidelines. We could spend time together and I could make a living." (I love that he chases after HIS dreams, even though conventional wisdom states being "the athlete" is the better choice.)

"What about before he's old enough?"

"Well, maybe you could help just for a couple of years. You said you can't wait to be a Grandma."

I had just seen the MOST ADORABLE infant outfit and had no one at all to buy it for.

"I will love to spend as much time with your kids as I can," I said.

Their plans and dreams are sometimes so far-fetched for this era in their lives. Two hours after this conversation, my terrific son was grilling me on loans and taxes and space rental to start his own elementary and middle school sports magazine. And the thing is, in about a decade or two, I have NO DOUBT he could start his own publication. Or found a technical research lab like he once begged us to help him do in a bunker he wanted to construct under the driveway. He has goals that are certainly attainable. Sometimes, he just needs a few years to really grow into them.

We arrived home and I walked outside to greet my daughter. She was lying on her back on the trampoline with her friend and they were playing "orphanage."

"Orphanage?" I asked. "That sounds like a strange game."

"Well, the flood waters came and washed our house away, and we got separated from our parents, so now we have to help each other to find something to eat."

This was a vastly different perspective from my oldest son's success stories. Jenny is obviously allowed to watch the evening news while my kids are not. Until now, Katrina was a vague word in their vocabulary. A tragedy without details. I tried to look past the faux paus that Jenny didn't even realize she was committing. After all, her parents don't know any differently either. And how sweet it was that Jenny's number one goal in her perilous world of make believe is to keep my daughter - her friend - protected. That made me smile.

Soon, I had diverted them toward happier thoughts. Now they were looking for shapes in the clouds.

Hearing their hearts' concerns, questions, and dreams. It's why my favorite time of day is the drive home from school. That's when they not only share the day's events, but give me their take on what it all might mean. Each day they change. Their views of the world become a little more knowledgeable, and so a little less innocent. But at least for now, they still believe that most people are good, that cotton candy is the world's most perfect treat and the tooth fairy is a worthy character. For now they see the world the way they want to and not the way their peers tell them they should. I pray that in particular never changes. For now, they live a lot in their make-believe places, and I am so blessed to be invited for frequent visits.

I hope that's still true even when their kids are calling me "Grandma."

Surreal

I know most of you are already praying for Ashley. God, PLEASE prepare our hearts for whatever Your will commands. And please let David and Trish be together with Ashley.