Aw Shucks!

I have never blogged on my computer. Since it caught a virus of some sort last November, I have stayed off of it to keep it from getting worse. And I've been using hubby's laptop for all of my online activities. (Think I'm a procrastinator? Think again. I am just that behind on all I want to do.)

Do you know what the man had the NERVE to suggest yesterday? That he should take HIS laptop with him for two days - the same exact two days I was going to spend catching up on all my favorite blogs (and that list has gotten quite long.) Have you ever?!

Does it seem fair that he should need a computer to go tailgating to a football game? (Men, you may not answer.)

O.K. So this was a pretty strong indication that perhaps I am more addicted than I was willing to admit.

But guess what tops the Christmas list I just now started?

FA-LA-LA-LA-LA LA-LA-LA LAPTOP!

(And I WON'T be home alone while he is gone, for anyone wondering about that. I'll just leave that to your imaginations. But know that I'm a very loyal person.)

When Words Fail

I've been thinking a lot lately about a lot. The most obvious reason to the blogging community is, of course, Ashley. For me, the primary way to communicate with her parents is like everybody else does, through her blog. We leave their cell phones alone so they can be in touch at all times with the doctors and with each other. But they are family and right now, at least, silence seems to speak more personally than a short snippet of dialogue accessible to the masses.

There have been other less obvious, almost as serious issues going on in our immediate household as well. Not in the life and death dimension of Ashley's struggles. But a spiritual battle. A very big one. And I am trying to give full energy to fighting it GOD'S way, which is harder, but I am convinced will reap the better outcome.

Then there's the baby. I am watching her for a friend while they try to straighten out finances from their own unexpected turn of events. She is absolutely PRECIOUS! And spoiled beyond belief. I could play with her literally for three hours straight, but the very second I put her down, she is wailing for attention. Her physical needs are all met, but her emotions definitely rank her as "high maintenance." Maybe that makes us two peas in a pod. Where are my little entertainers when I need them? At school.

So my blog is a little quiet for the time being. I am writing a little tiny bit. But I will post them later when it seems a little more appropriate. If I sound a bit sad, I guess I am. But just a bit. "Reflective" would seem a little more true description. I am in the Word a good deal more than usual right now. I'm feeling particularly drawn to it. And one verse keeps standing out amongst all the rest. It shows me that I am currently in a period of learning. That I am to pay attention and get from these recent experiences whatever wisdom they were designed to teach me. That I should shut up for a while, quit opining, and listen.

"This book of the law shall not depart out of thy mouth, but thou shalt meditate therein day and night, that thou mayest observe to do according to all that is written therein, for then thou shalt make thy way prosperous, and then thou shalt have good success." Joshua 1:8

Thank You, God, for one year today of time with Ashley since her transplant. Thank You for the time she spent recently in our home. Please be with her donor's family today. And please continue to be with Ashley as she struggles to for life. Thank You, so much, for fellow bloggers who pray! And for everything else You're working on in our lives. Please help the person who is struggling with righteousness and help us who bear the consequences to be patient and forgiving - seventy times seven, without excuse. I simply can't do it on my own. Thank You that sadness is rarely ever without intermingled joy when we look to You. Today, in the midst of all my concerns, You have given me a measure of Peace. Thank You for Your sacrifice! In Jesus name.

THANK YOU TO EVERYONE LEAVING ENCOURAGEMENT AT ASHLEY'S STORY! I HAVE SEEN MANY OF YOUR COMMMENTS COMING FROM MY BLOG AND I WANT YOU TO KNOW IT IS MAKING A DIFFERENCE TO A HURTING FAMILY!!!!

A Simple Prayer

Thank you, Dear God, for helping Ashley to improve some last night. Her health is still precarious, and I pray you would help the physician's staff to find answers that would bring her even more comfort. Thank you for every single individual who has shown their concern and for those who have bowed their heads before you on Ashley's behalf in the busyness of their own lives. Thank you for listening and loving us. In JESUS our SAVIOR'S name, I pray.

Focusing On Ashley

Ashley is not well. It is scary. I truly can not begin to understand the feelings of my brother's family right now. I am only the distant aunt, and my emotions are in knots for her. It's unimaginable (for a reason) what it must be like for them as parents. Thank you to all who continue to pray!!!

CLICK HERE TO READ UPDATES AND SPECIFIC PRAYER REQUESTS FOR ASHLEY

In Support Of Ashley

Thank You!
...to everyone who has left messages of encouragement and prayed and asked for prayers on your own blogs. It is truly one of the sweetest benefits of blogging, having a circle of friends who care about each other's needs, even if they've never met in person.

From Ashley's Blog

Thank you so much to everyone who has inquired about Ashley's progress overnight. I have not spoken to my mom in several hours because she is watching Blake and Allie, Ashley's brother and sister, and running them around to activities so they can maintain kid's lives in the midst of things so heavy for their young hearts to comprehend. When she can update me, it is, of course, second hand information. And what she does say to me that Dave and Trish don't post themselves I am assuming they would like to remain private, although they have shared all that I myself know since they were able to arrive in Nebraska. Updates on Ashley should be regular now at Ashley's Story since they are no longer en route.

It appears that Ashley's surgery last night to replace her central line went well, despite some serious initial concerns. I am convinced that the humongous blogging prayer chain yesterday had a significant part in that.

So again - THANK YOU for your compassion and concern. It meant the world!

URGENT PRAYER REQUEST

I do not feel comfortable sharing details that are not mine to tell, but I am asking for anyone visiting this blog who has a blog and feels so led to please pass on requests for prayer for my niece, Ashley, of Ashley's Story. (See post below.) My SIL can not currently post herself because she IS on the way to Omaha (along with my brother, Ashley's dad) with Ashley where Ashley received her organ transplant one year ago next Wednesday. This should NOT be an assumption of rejection. My family has told me nothing like that. But Ashley is CRITICALLY sick and could use your prayers! Also, if you live in their area, please be sensitive to the fact that I am trying to garner prayer for Ashley, but Dave and Trish have not yet had a chance to talk to Blake and Allison. Please let them inform them of their trip. Thank you - so much. We know that there are literally a thousand things and people you could pray for today and any moments spent on Ashley's behalf are more humbling and precious to me than I could ever express!

In A Week

Sweet Baby Ashley Kate

In one week, it will be the one year anniversary of my sweet niece's second shot at life. One year ago next week marks the one year anniversary of the day one baby left Earth, and Ashley was given a chance to live. She received three healthy organs just before liver failure set in. She has lived this new life to her fullest potential.

In one week, an anonymous family will mourn the passing of their own precious child. How he or she died, or where, we do not know. But God does and we pray He is already preparing the hearts of the parents and grandparents and friends and neighbors.

In one week, Ashley's life will be dramatically different than it is today. She is not doing well. Since Saturday she has been battling her biggest setback in more than 5 months. She needs prayers so desperately right now, and I would appreciate any and all that are offered for her. In a week, she will either be much better with the medical help she receives. Or God will have lessons to be learned through the trials. Lessons to change us and make us stronger. We, of course, hope for the former. But either way, in one week, we will be different, having been changed in some way or another by the events of this life. It's what life is. A growth process. Sometimes it hurts. I pray that in one week, my family can celebrate. Not just celebrate God for all of His goodness toward Ashley this past year. But I hope we can celebrate Ashley's current health as well. I really, REALLY would like for my brother and his tired, dedicated wife to be able to celebrate this anniversary outside the hospital, at home, with Ashley having bounced back from whatever it is that is making her so very sick. I would really like for Ashley to be surrounded by smiles and balloons, not tubes and machines - and pain, God bless her.

If you get a moment today, please pray for little Ashley. Today she is weak. Hopefully, if we surround the throne of grace, she will be strong in a week.

A Little Late, But Quite Sincere

A week ago Sunday was Grandparents' Day, but I missed it because I had it written down as this past Sunday. Then I missed it again because I've been sick. So my great parents and my lovely Grandmother never heard from me. My MIL and I had dinner for other reasons altogether, but I never mentioned it because I am, obviously, losing brain cells by the bunches. But we love them all four, dearly, and my hubby's handsome Grand dad, because they are quite simply some of the best human beings for us to have the privilege of sharing a legacy with, for a whole host of reasons:

For being willing to explain the details of a sport, even right in the middle of The Big Play.

For hosting "just because" parties for the grandchildren including real invitations by snail mail for them to receive.

For purposely being too slow to beat the train across the tracks, even though it makes you late to an appointment.

For hours on a ladder painting clouds upon their ceilings.

For learning new talents and skills and computer programs with them around, so they know that they're never too old to learn and grow. Or never too young to be a help. :0)

For spending time picking vegetables in the garden - or fishing or riding four wheelers or running errands, visiting family, shooting guns or making crafts - instead of always huddling in front of the television.

For having patience while they were still learning that "sharing" referred to bicycles and toys, but not to toothbrushes and drinks.

For biting your tongue while we as parents were learning the difference between defiant disobedience and simple childhood foolishness, and for when we mistook the latter for the former.

For telling them stories of their parents as kids and for making us sound like heroes.

For deferring to our preferences as their parents and letting us raise them our way. For respecting our choices on drinking and movies and world news and dress and Santa Clause.

For so many of our ways being the very way we were raised because they work and they are right.

For not allowing any disrespect with the excuse that they are "just kids."

For being equally interested in ALL their activities, as diverse and silly and new as they sometimes are.

For holiday traditions they look forward to for weeks.

For telling them "You can do it!" when you're not completely convinced yourself.

For remembering the time I crawled into bed with one of them after a particularly bad nightmare, but not the time I punished one of them for stalling bedtime, when they really had a case of pin worms. And for assuring me that even the cleanest home wouldn't have prevented them from getting it.

For pancake breakfasts and fun discussions about what they'll be when they grow up.

For reminders that they have many years until they HAVE TO grow up.

For sharing with them the "Good Ole' Days" without making their own days sound bad or scary by comparison.

For praying for our efforts in raising them!

For making a trip to your home seem inviting and familiar and adventurous and new - all at once.

For saving the housework until we leave.

For hanging their artwork on YOUR refrigerators.

For referring to your grandchild in heaven by name.

For admitting to feeding them ice cream every night before bed and setting that precedent for honesty. It was the more important lesson. :0)

For not buying them EVERY thing they want, just because you can.

For telling them "you look JUST LIKE your mommy at that age," and meaning it as a compliment.

For watching the same rated "G" show for the tenth time when you would really like to see "48 Hour Mysteries."

For trying to still lift and hold and swing them, even though it hurts a little more now that they're bigger.

For treating the boys like boys and the girls like girls - guilt and PC free!

For making the drive to see us more than we do to see you. It hasn't gone unnoticed - or unappreciated!

For being at so many Birthday parties, even though they are too busy with their friends to pay much attention. They cherish you there in the photos!

For being "Grandma" or "Grandpa" to their friends and cousins who don't see theirs'.

For letting them call home at midnight if they want to.

For meaning NO when you say "No." And for not saying it very often.

For imposing a bed time, but not necessarily a sleep time. For extra kisses and tickles and "boog-a-doo, boog-a-doos."

For introducing them to your own circles of wise and weird and accomplished and quirky friends.

For reminding them in speech and in deed that virtue and character and church and friendship and hard work and forgiveness and God ARE IMPORTANT!

For making God bigger than the four walls of our own home.

For being such top-notch examples of integrity and love. They only have 5 grandparents. But you all are enough to show them all they need to see.

The Fast And The Furious And Down For The Count

I have worn myself out. My body is refusing to agree with my brain that I am still the same woman I was when I gave birth to three children, albeit not all at once. I've NEVER been THAT energetic. But I have always prided myself on being able to do 83 things at once and still manage to have my hair look done. Of course, pride is a sin and perhaps the good Lord has been trying to show me a thing or two. Like that rest is actually a GOOD thing. I am home with the flu and.........honestly, rather enjoying it. It's nice to sort of feel too dizzy to drive, wrapped up in a thick warm blanket doing NOTHING. It's quite nice in fact. Although doing a lot sure was fun too.

Friday after school - watched my boys play football on the front lawn while talking life with my stunning young girl on the front yard park bench. I loved the whole atmosphere. A crisp breeze. A really clear view of the bright yellow sun over the ridge into the town below. The kids periodically coming over to eat chips straight out of the bag (a special treat.)

Friday evening - helped the kids clean their rooms before taking them to their cousin's 8th birthday party. Stayed after the cake and ice cream/gift-opening/boys-allowed part to help my overwhelmed SIL paint nails and do facials for the "spa" theme. Heard 16 (it was a sleepover - she's crazy, folks!) little people squeal in alternating drama, angst and delight for three hours.

Came home and went straight to bed early (for me.)

Saturday morning - went to my little guys very first ever football game (at 8 am!) He loved it! So did I! He was so great.

Picked up my pretty princess from the party. Switched off little guy for older brother. Went to his two football games. So proud of his sportsmanship and perseverance. He made the last great play of the game!

Came home to change clothes. Took an allergy pill. Went to sell popcorn for Cubscouts.

Took son to Grandma's house.

Took my daughter to see "Princess Wishes On Ice." (TOTALLY wacky people at the fair this year! It's usually pretty colorful, but, OH MY........and again with the traffic! Worst ever.) Loved every second. So glad she's still into it.

Feeling yucky and exhausted, didn't want to cook. Took MIL and kids out for dinner at super fun diner she suggested. Had wonderful conversation and the best chicken fried steak ever. (I don't usually crave that, but I hadn't eaten much all weekend and it sounded good. Tasted delicious but unfortunately I got to "enjoy" it twice. Oops.)

Came home. Did laundry for church. Listened to younger son and hubby describe the very crazy scene at the fair that we had already witnessed earlier. Went to bed early, smiling.

Sometimes, not constantly, but sometimes, it's nice to just live until you've got nothing left for a couple of days. It really was a sweet weekend, even if I've had to resort to short phrases in describing it. It really was.

If hubby seems conspicuously missing, his time was spent working on the yard (which he likes), cooking for his men's prayer breakfast, and going to a college football game and then the fair with our youngest son. Today he's offered to take the kids to church and out somewhere fun so I can rest.

Traffic

It is the primary reason my husband, whose lived practically everywhere in his lifetime, begged his city-born-and-bred bride to move to the country last year. He HATES it. In fact, besides his propensity for watching Learning Channel documentaries for fun on Friday nights, it was the one of the earliest clues that I had married a man much like my own father, as the old cliche goes.

Every morning by 6 or 7 AM, my husband is trailing down the path toward work, a different construction site every day. All the while he's Christian cursing (you know, in his mind :0) ) every car that cuts him off. He is driving 38 feet of Super Duty truck and trailer, which decidedly won't stop on a dime. But little hot rods intent on dodging in and out of traffic are ignorant to this fact. And while my husband knows he would win in any collision, he doesn't really want the inadvertent bloody death of another human being on his conscience for the rest of eternity.

Yesterday, Greg's trek from one job to the next took him right through the heart of the downtown area just at the height of rush hour. At that point, he would rather have gone shopping for clothes at the mall for four hours with my daughter and her most talkative friends. Then treating them to tofu for lunch. And that's saying something.

He was sitting in the left southbound lane, waiting to turn eastbound with four lanes in all directions backed up as far as he could see. The northbound and southbound lanes have those annoying little "islands" dividing the directions for a full mile. The eastbound/westbound lanes are curvy and sport stoplights about every 50 feet, running the length of a large university. Fun, huh?

The corner is hard enough for him to make in his caravan of equipment without the five to six cars that run each red light, hoping to make some sort of progress on their 8-minute waits at the stop light. But he had finally hit the holy grail, perched in his number two spot behind a little old man who had pulled too far into the intersection during the last light. "That's a good thing," hubby reasoned. "He's out there so people will have to let him go." Ready, set, GREEN LIGHT...........

Funeral procession! Coming from the southbound lane going north, past my hubby on the other side of the islands. Car after car of mourners flanked by motorcycle police. He sat through two more lights. No sooner was the tail end officer making his way across the intersection than a siren could be heard in the distance.

Guess what building sits just adjacent to the university? A fire house. Yep. And guess where it was going? You got it. Northbound into the funeral procession. My husband's story had me riveted at this point. "How did they get through?"

Over the islands. It seems the daily commuters who had been northbound prior to the funeral procession had gotten over to the right to let them pass. And the procession filled up the entirety of the left northbound lane. Hubby just wanted to get home and eat a piece of meat. The fire truck was having to wind in and out of north and southbound lanes, over islands as the driver weaved side to side, filling in whatever small pockets of space the drivers, including funeral attendees, could concoct. Oh, and the fire he was going to......was in the general direction of the cemetery, whose main entrance is closed for major road repairs and requires a detour around a mile long block to access.

But that's not all. Oh, I thought so too. There can't be more, I thought. It sounds like a movie. "It looked like one," hubby deadpanned. The firetruck had rendered all lights red at the intersection via remote control in order to try to navigate his way up the road. Another 5 minutes passed before hubby once again got the green go-ahead - and the distant sound of yet another siren. Yes, folks, here came the ambulance, wailing through the evening wind. And going....you guessed it. Right past where hubby needed to turn. And I DO mean NEEDED to turn! He said by the next green light, he was practically pushing that little old man across the intersection from his high perch in his beast of a truck. After all, if his barely contained aggression were to cause this man some kind of fear or hurt, the man had every known type of emergency vehicle close at his disposal. Or my husband's tractor to scrape him off the roadway!