Blessed Number 13

As I sit here without the words coming to me like they usually do, all I can think is that I am contented to be your wife. Thirteen years ago to the day since taking that title, I am spending a low-key, overcast day at home. Our three kids are at school, you are sick at work (sorry!) and I am glad that we are together. Not just that we share a last name, but finally we share a good and growing understanding of one other. It feels so ......warm. I'm sorry for the way our life together started. I'm sorry for the way those beginnings became bad habits that lingered for so much longer than we ever dreamed. I'm sorry that we were two immature kids trying to handle extremely grown up problems right from the get-go, even if that was our lot and out of our control. I do still wish it could have been different. But despite it all, we've also made it so much longer than either of us ever bothered with anyone else before we met - before you scrawled your number in my Bible so I wouldn't lose it a fourth time and I gave you that little garage sale hedgehog "To Cement Our Friendship."

Remember the night we both realized things were moving in a different direction? We had to sit in your black truck for about three hours for the hail to subside so we could run to my apartment? And EVERYONE remembers the four inches of downpour on our Wedding Day. (It's become church Legend, hasn't it?) April always has been our month for storms. So, I suppose today's weather is fitting. It's overcast, like our lives have been, with various trials to turn our plans soggy (especially in April!) But it's not raining! The clouds are slowly clearing. And you know what else? It's not cold like most of the previous years. It's warm outside for the first 4/22 in a long time.

Thirteen YEARS! Neither of us seems old enough. I'm still too adventurous and you're still too strong and handsome to be nearing having teenagers of our own! Together we've been through far too much to need the highly romanticized view of happiness as a couple. (Though I appreciate you learning to indulge me SOME. :) ) I like what we have better. I like that you kiss me in the morning and say "I love you" when my face is unmade and completely blemished and convince me that even then you really, truly mean it. I love that you trust me to tell me what I don't want to hear and realize that when I whine about it, it's not because I'm trying to change your mind, but because you are the person I feel most comfortable venting to. I am even learning to appreciate how you often refer to weight gain in terms of "we," because I've always longed for "we" over "you and I." And weight gain is not so bad when it results from the many meals we've shared together since our bachelor/ette days.

I also love how this rambling will make sense to so few, but to you it will. Or at least you will pretend it does. You're a good man!

After thirteen years together, THIS is the VERY BEST ONE ever. (I can't wait for this weekend!)

Happy Anniversary!

I love you, Babe.